Get

In Your Inbox

Catster is reader-supported. When you buy via links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission at no cost to you. Learn more.

What Is a Cat Kiss? Feline Affection Explained

Share

burmese cat kissing womans nose

Scientists have come far in understanding cat body language, but there is still a lot we don’t know. We cannot know what goes on inside a cat’s head. They don’t exactly talk, which means we typically have to use roundabout methods to figure out what they mean.

Cats do have a lot to say despite not speaking like we do. They constantly use body language to talk to their owners and communicate with them.

Cats may not kiss the way humans do, but they do have several ways they show affection. We’ll review some of these ways below, including the lowdown on cat kisses.

divider single cat paw oct 2024

What Is a Cat Kiss?

One of the most unique ways that cats show affection is through the “slow blink,” which functions as an invitation for attention—this is what’s commonly referred to as a “cat kiss”. Simply put, the slow blink is just like any other blink. However, it is extra slow and relaxed. It’s a sign of trust and affection. Some cats will do it when they want their owners to pet them.

Your cat may also understand the slow blink if you do it. It’s one of the few ways humans can try to communicate back to cats on their own terms, but whether they fully understand it, we cannot be sure.

cat licking human arm
Image Credit: sophiecat, Shutterstock

Other Ways Cats Show Affection

While the slow blink or cat kiss is one of the most endearing ways cats show affection, there are also several others, including:

  • Purring: Most people know what a cat purr is, and it’s one of the most common body language signs associated with contentment and happiness. However, cats can also purr for other reasons, including pain. It’s important to look at other signs of them, too.
  • Bunting: Most people also know what “bunting” is. This occurs when the cat rubs their head, body, or cheeks against you. It’s a way of transferring their scent to you, which signals you as part of their “colony.”
  • Kneading: Some cats knead all the time, while other cats may not knead at all. Usually, this is accompanied by purring, and it resembles how a kitten nurses. Some cats may even suck on whatever they are kneading on.
  • Sleeping on or near you: Cats that feel safe in your presence will often choose to curl up in your lap or near you. Some cats like sitting in laps, while others do not. Often, this is a personal preference, not a sign of whether or not your cat likes you.
  • Tail language: You can tell a lot about your cat’s feelings through their tail. A relaxed, slightly upright tail signals that your cat is content and happy. Often, the tip will be slightly curved. A gently swaying tail can also indicate excitement or playfulness.
  • Grooming you: If your cat licks your hands or hair, they’re likely trying to groom you. This behavior is a traditional way cats build relationships, so it’s a signal that they like you.

It’s important to remember that cats are individuals, and some may use these behaviors more than others. Some cats may never slowly blink and instead spend their time licking you, while others may hardly ever knead.

woman-sleeping-with-her-cat
Image Credit: ajlatan, Shutterstock

Why Are Some Cats More Aloof than Others?

Interacting with a very affectionate cat and then a very aloof cat can be a bit nerve-wracking. It’s easy to think that your cat doesn’t like you if they aren’t as affectionate as other people’s cats. However, this is often far from the truth. Cats are naturally independent creatures, and their behaviors depend a lot on their temperament and character.

Some cats may be shyer, which makes them naturally less open in their communication. Other cats may be hesitant to show affection due to a poor past experience, particularly in a new home in the very beginning. They are likely to become more affectionate as more time passes and they settle in. Cats that aren’t properly socialized may always be a little less open about their feelings.

However, patience and positive reinforcement can help bring these cats out of their shells. Still, you shouldn’t expect every cat to be very affectionate and constantly show the behaviors we described above. We highly recommend that you learn to be open and accepting of your cat’s personality.

cat-hiding_
Image Credit: Mantikorra, Shutterstock

How Can I Encourage My Cat to Show Me More Affection?

The most important thing you should do is create a safe, loving environment. It’s important not to push your cat to have temperament traits they just don’t have. You should be open to how your cat acts, even if they aren’t as affectionate as you would like them to be.

However, there are some things you can do to encourage your cat to be more affectionate. Spend quality time with your cat every day. This may include playing, petting, and simply sitting together. Your cat won’t bond with you if you aren’t around very much.

Always respect your cat’s boundaries. Don’t force your cat to interact with you if they don’t want to. If they seem uncomfortable, back off a bit. Use positive reinforcement and show your cat that playing together is a joyful and relaxed experience. Petting, praise, and treats all work well as your cat is comfortable with them.

Of course, all of this takes time. It’s important to be patient and let your cat warm up to you slowly. Cats do not like being pushed into interactions, as it can make them feel threatened. Not all cats are as people-oriented as most dogs are, so it’s important to enjoy your relationship with them on their terms.

Playing is an important part of keeping your cat mentally and physically engaged, and a great toy will make it much easier. We like Hepper's Catnip Stick Toys because they're sturdy enough to handle intense play and completely filled with organic catnip. You'll love the fun range of pastel colors and your cat will enjoy the prey-like shape!

Hepper Stick Catnip Cat Kicker Toy
  • No Filler - Like all the best cat toys our is stuffed with 100% organic catnip. Cheap cat toys with...
  • Flexible Play - Simple plush shape is great for biting, scratching and pawing. It can start life as...
  • Durably Designed - Our cat safe toys are hand-stitched with a double-lined exterior construction for...

At Catster, we’ve admired Hepper for many years and decided to take a controlling ownership interest so that we could benefit from the outstanding designs of this cool cat company!

divider cats oct 2024

Final Thoughts

Cats may not show their affection like we do, but they do still feel and show it. It just takes some understanding on our part to figure out their body language. Cats can feel six basic emotions. However, these are sadly not yet very fully understood by science. Often, problem behaviors develop when we do not understand exactly how our cats are feeling, if their needs are not fulfilled, or if they are stressed, bored, frustrated, or scared.

Cats show affection through many different types of body language. The slow blink or “cat kiss” is one of the most common and can be copied by humans to try and communicate with their feline.


Featured Image Credit: Julija Sulkovska, Shutterstock

Want content like this delivered to you?

Sign Up For Our Newsletter

News, insights, expert advice, and everything cat

* By submitting, you agree to our Terms & Conditions and Privacy & Cookies Policy.




How useful was this post?

Click on a star to rate (you can leave written feedback after clicking submit)

Help us improve Catster for pet parents!

Your feedback really matters.

What did you like about this post? Also how can we improve it?

Join the conversation

Leave a Reply

You’re very welcome to leave a comment or question. Please know that all comments must meet our community guidelines, and your email address will NOT be published. Let’s have a positive and constructive conversation.


Catster's Digital Magazine is Back!

Vet-approved health & behavior advice

Real cat stories & community features

Chatting About Big Cat Tourism, Lion Hunting, and Learning From Our Mistakes | Chatty Cattys, Episode 26

In this episode of Catster’s Chatty Cattys podcast, Nicole and Dr. Karyn dive into the dark side of big cat tourism and the...

Why Cats Sit by the Door (But Don’t Go Through It)

Door-sitting is one of those quirky little habits that almost every cat owner experiences at some point. You know how it goes: a...

Six Legs Are Better Than Three – How A Tripod Dog and Kitten Found Friendship Through Recovery

Sometimes the most meaningful friendships begin in the most unexpected places. At a Maryland veterinary hospital operated by Last Chance Animal Rescue, two...

The Original Space Invaders – Why Zero Respect for Personal Boundaries Is a Good Thing

Cats have a reputation for being independent, and in many ways they are. But anyone who has tried to work at a laptop...

More related

12 Vet-Approved Ways to Calm a Cat Down at Night

We all love our cats, but if they’re suddenly full of energy as soon as the sun goes down and you’re trying to...

11 Best Cat Water Fountains in 2026 – Reviews & Top Picks

Our cats need to drink enough water every day so they can stay hydrated and feel great. One problem, however, is that cats...

Why Do I Need to Clean My Cat’s Litter Box? 10 Vet Reviewed Reasons & Cleaning Tips

As a cat owner, you know that cleaning the litter box is definitely the least pleasant chore associated with caring for your feline...

10 Best Cat Litter Box Furniture & Enclosures of 2026: Reviews & Top Picks

Coping with a stinky litter box is a timeless and universal experience known all too well to cat owners. Life with our cats...

Keep reading

Can Cats Eat Frogs? Vet-Reviewed Safety Facts

If you have a rambunctious feline with a strong prey drive, you have likely come across them playing with something strange or unsavory. Cats are incredible hunters, and they will hunt almost anything smaller than themselves. In many climates, that...

Can Cats Eat Frogs

6 Best Cat Foods for Kidney Disease in Canada of 2026: Reviews & Top Picks

Learning that your cat has a chronic condition, such as chronic kidney disease (CKD), can feel scary. Though this condition is often not curable or reversible, depending on the cause, support and treatment can improve your kitty’s quality of life...

top view of a cream maine coon cat eating dry and wet pet food from feeding dish

Why Does My Cat Throw Up After Eating? 8 Vet-Reviewed Reasons & Solutions

If your cat starts throwing up after they eat, it’s obviously very alarming behavior that you want to get to the bottom of as soon as possible. But what exactly could be the cause of your kitty’s stomach issues? Vomiting...

sick cat vomiting the food on a white background

How to Introduce a Hyper Dog to a Kitten: Vet-Reviewed Step-by-Step Guide

Having a family full of furry friends can be a lot of fun if all the required precautions have been considered. When you want to introduce more than one species into the mix, things can be more complicated, even when...

dog and kitten

Why Does My Cat Run Away From Me? 10 Vet-Reviewed Reasons & How to Stop It

If you have a cat that keeps running away, it can be a scary and frustrating experience, even if they always come back. If you are looking for ways to prevent this, you’ve come to the right place. Here are...

scared British blue-point cat hiding under the bed

Uveitis in Cats: Vet-Reviewed Causes, Signs & Treatment

Uveitis is an eye disease resulting from inflammation in the uvea of the eye. It is a serious condition that must be addressed promptly because it can commonly result in blindness. It can sometimes be challenging to treat, so it’s...

Cat Uveitis

Is It True That Male Cats Kill Kittens? Vet-Reviewed Behavior Explanation

If you’ve heard that male cats might sometimes harm or kill kittens, you’re likely reading this now to see if there’s any truth to it. This is particularly critical if you have a male cat and are considering adopting a...

cat with kitten outdoors

How to Get a Urine Sample From a Cat: Effective Vet Approved Tips & FAQ

A urine sample can help a veterinarian check for various conditions in a feline’s urinary tract and kidneys. If your vet has asked you to bring in a sample of urine from your cat, you might be feeling a bit...

woman collecting urine sample of an orange cat

Love Cats? So Do We! Join the Catster Community

Stay informed with expert pet care insights delivered straight to your inbox! Discover professional guidance on animal behavior, feeding tips, trusted product picks, and much more.




Sign up for the Catster Email Newsletter

Stay informed with expert pet care insights delivered straight to your inbox! Discover professional guidance on animal behavior, feeding tips, trusted product picks, and much more.